The Great Political Meltdown in Aisle Five

So there I am in the grocery store, cruising through Aisle 5, when I spot this political magazine cover. It’s got one of those headlines – you know, the kind that's like a red flag to a bull. Without even thinking, I start ranting to a stack of canned beans about policy and politicians.

Mid-rant, I turn around and lock eyes with a beautiful lady who had been quietly choosing her soup. Her expression? A mix of horror and fascination, as if she’d stumbled onto a live TV debate instead of the soup aisle.

I'm all in now. I gesture wildly with a can of beans, breaking down the state of the nation for an audience of one very confused shopper and a tower of bean cans. She nods slowly, edging her cart around me, clearly deciding that any soup is good enough if it means escaping my impromptu political soapbox.

Just as I’m about to really dive into my points, the store manager shows up. He’s trying hard not to laugh as he asks if I’m planning to buy the beans or just use them as props for my next big point. Red-faced, I buy the beans (out of embarrassment) and make a hasty retreat.

Now, every time I hit the store, I steer clear of Aisle 5. You never know when the beans – or a magazine – might set you off on another grocery store filibuster.

Sammy, Rhode Island